Thursday, May 30, 2013

In pieces

It's easier said than done. 
I can't do it, Barney, not now, not at this moment. 

At this moment, let me be sad.
Let me hear the breaking bones in my body, 
Let me feel the ruptures of the veins,
Let me endure the slit on my skin, 
Let me watch the blood drip endlessly. 

I'm an idiot for not taking this offer,
I'm sorry I had to discard this blessing from You,
I care too much for Papa,
I had to let this slip away.

Sometimes I wish Papa is 40 instead of 60,
Sometimes I wish I have more siblings before me,
Sometimes I wish I'm selfish and self-centred,
Sometimes I wish I didn't have to care.

I hope and pray this is for the best,
I can't make him work till he's old and frail. 
I just can't. 

This is the reality of my life, 
No matter how unfortunate the circumstances are,
I'll stead fast,
and strive for a better tomorrow. 

Miss V
- in pieces -